A Wife came Home early and found her Husband in their Bedroom making love to a very Attractive Young Woman. She was very Upset.

_"You are a Disrēspêctful Pīg!"_ she Cried.

_"How dare you do this to me – a Faithful Wife, the Mother of your Children! I'm Leaving you. I want a Divorce, NOW!"_

The Husband calmly replied, _"Hang on just a Minute Love. At least let me tell you what Happened."_

_"Fine, go ahead",_ the Wife Sobbed, _"but they will be the last Words you say to me!"_
The Husband Began:

_"Well, as I was getting into the Car at Work to drive Home, this Young Lady here asked me for a Lift. She looked so Distressed, Helpless and Defenceless that I took Pity on her and let her into the Car."_

_"She was very Thin, not well Dressed and very Dirty and told me that she hadn't Eaten for Three Days."_

_"Out of Compassion, I brought her Home and Warmed up the Pizza I made for you last Night that you wouldn’t eat because you're afraid you'll put on Weight. The Poor thing Ate it, Ravenously."_

_"She was Dirty. I suggested she have a Shower. While Showering, I noticed her Clothes were Filthy and Threadbare. I threw them away."_

_"I gave her the Designer Jeans that you’ve had for a Few Years, but don’t Wear because you say they are too Tight."_

_"I gave her Underwear, your Anniversary Present from me, which you don’t Wear because you said I don't have Good Taste."_
_"I gave her the Sexy Blouse my sister gave you for Christmas, that you don’t Wear just to annoy her.

I also donated those Boots you bought at an expensive Boutique but don’t Wear because someone at Work has the same Pair."_
The Husband Paused, took a quick Breath and continued:

_"She was so Grateful for my understanding and help that as I walked her to the Door, she turned to me with Tears in her Eyes and said, “Please Sir... Do you have anything else that your Wife doesn’t use?”